Valentine’s Day on the Spectrum

Ah Valentine’s Day, a Spectrum person’s least favorite holiday. (Well for me at least because I’m 28 and still single) It’s not really fun for us as it is for the ‘Ables’ as I like to call the non-Spectrum or disabled people in this world. It’s not fun because we are often overlooked due to the intense commitment that you need to be our lifelong companions. We want to be loved too, but this fast paced world we are in today makes it harder to find the right person. I hadn’t had a date in four and a half years because of how I know exactly what I want (Or maybe it’s because I forget to wash my hair and shave IDK). The Ables these days want the one night stand but don’t want to commit as soon as they hear the chick they had sex with is expecting their child. They aren’t willing to accept the consequences. I work at a Veterinary office as an assistant. I was talking about how Valentine’s Day makes me sad because of how I don’t have anyone. One of the younger Vets who was married (I know this because I met her husband at the company party), said that she deemed the holiday overrated, which shocked me because of the fact that she was married. I think it’s a unique opinion on my account, because of how it’s hard for someone on the spectrum to be in a relationship and keep it that way. The reason why that is, is because of how the Spectrum community is in terms of how mild and severe we can be and how we interact and interpret things within those interactions (which can make an able think we’re either weird, stiff, or both). These views make it very lonely for us who want to be in love like everyone else. They expect to fall head over heels right away. We’re not like that. We’re not like that because of how Autism Speaks lies makes people think of us. We’ve gotten used to the stigmas people have about the spectrum community. A spectrum romance is like Beauty and the Beast when Belle doesn’t care about looks and loves him as a whole. WHY can’t we be loved for who we are? Why are we always stuck wearing a mask just to fit in and be liked? You would think that in the world we live in today it would not be as shallow as it was. It’s still very petty. The animal instinct in us looking for the best looking man/woman/partner to mate with hasn’t died; it’s like an old record that starts up again. To anyone who wants a spectrum partner: it’s a big commitment, but once we warm up to you, it’s worth it because you will have a loyal companion for life.

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